Morticia the Murderous Mistress My mother was obsessed with The Addams Family. Quite fitting actually because I come from a long line of witches, freaks, serial killers, vamps, zombies, and people that were often considered the outcasts of society. I was born with dark hair and dark eyes, and she said the name was most fitting. I enjoyed playing in graveyards, and at the funeral home my Uncle Fester owned. He used to let me watch while he made the dead people look alive again for their families to look at one last time.

Nothing, when I was growing up, was “normal”. We lived in a huge, rambling old Gothic Victorian house with a large, unkempt garden that covered the property. I loved it, especially the spooky garden and the mute and frightening statues that adorned the property. All of the other children in town were terrified of my home and kept well away. I was picked on all the time because I was different than the pretty little pink girls. My mother decorated my room with family history. There were photos of hangings, murders, dead relatives, and anything else gruesome that other families would most certainly consider morbid.

The Guys seem to find me intriguing; they want to get to know me, but most are a little apprehensive, perhaps scared. Are you? I'm not like those cookie-cutter Barbie dolls, I'm into murder and mayhem more than shopping and boys. I'm more into blood and gore than wine and cheese. I am a Murderous Mistress! I will weave a spell, catch you in my web, and then someone has to bleed!

Give me a call and let's play some games, I have some interesting ones, and I feel sure you do, too, you nasty man!

Your Lovely Mortici